Will You Be Disadvantaged in Divorce Mediation if Your Spouse Has More Financial Knowledge and Control?

In his article, "Power Imbalance in Divorce Mediation: How Mediators Level the Playing Field," San Diego Mediator Shawn Weber recommends parties hire a neutral financial specialist when one spouse feels disadvantaged because the other spouse has a higher level of financial knowledge and control.

A financial specialist trained in divorce, such as a certified divorce financial analyst (CDFA®), gathers financial information from both parties regarding their assets, debts, income, and expenses. In my practice, I incorporate forensic accounting techniques to help determine the community and separate property portions of commingled assets such as retirement accounts with balances before marriage, real estate owned before marriage, and restricted stock units and stock options that are granted during marriage but vest after the parties' marital date of separation.

Even after all financial information has been presented, both spouses can benefit from the CDFA's insights and expertise. The CDFA can clarify how this financial data affects the decisions each spouse must consider concerning the division of assets and debts, as well as the inputs and assumptions for calculating child and spousal support.

Some couples prefer to work with me prior to divorce mediation while others choose to hire me as a co-mediator.

Certified Divorce Financial Analyst sitting at desk with a mediating couple

How to Involve a Neutral Financial Specialist

Parties interested in hiring a neutral financial specialist should consider the following steps:

1. Discuss with the mediator about involving a financial expert early in the process.

2. Agree on the financial specialist’s role and scope to ensure clear expectations.

3. Select a qualified CDFA with experience relevant to the case.

4. Share financial documents promptly to allow thorough review.

5. Use the specialist’s reports as a basis for negotiation, not as a tool for conflict.

More Tips from Mediator Shawn Weber

Shawn's article also explains the benefits of consulting with an attorney throughout the mediation process to ensure you understand your legal rights and the potential outcome if you and your spouse were to go to court and have financial decisions made by a judge. He also recommends working with a specialized therapist or coach to learn how you can regulate your emotions and engage in negotiations with your spouse in a constructive manner.